I don’t know what it is, exactly. I feel great; positive, like I’m actually finally moving forward in so many ways. But, something is just MISSING.
Job, excited. Friends, beyond blessed. Family, more than I could ever ask for or deserve.
I’m working so hard every day, and I’m nothing but enthusiastic and ready for it. I have gotten to a point where mentors have nothing but amazing feedback. I am fulfilled and sure that my life will affect others in the most positive way. What am I missing?
This nagging, relentless tug. Pulling me from the side, from the center of my chest. Reminding me that part of me needs more. A pinch in my arm. A flicker in the deepest regions of my mind. I dive deep but it will not reveal itself.
Admittedly, my heart still aches, no matter the blessings I see on the horizon. I can still feel a vacant space. My body tenses without my knowledge of the culprit.
I’m not consciously looking for it. Probably best, since it’s working so hard to hide. Maybe if I’m patient, perhaps if it finds me worthy, it’ll allow a vision of what I’m yearning for.
Only time will tell. But it won’t stop me from pushing myself onward.
Someday, little whatever you are… Someday.
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